All examples given in this blog are hypothetical. No reference to real people, living or dead should be inferred.
How do we view change? Do we look forward to it? Or do we dread it?
For instance, if you’ve scheduled a Zoom meeting with a potential client, who then at the last minute changes the time of the meeting. How does that make you feel?
Maybe you booked a holiday to go to Euro Disney and then the pandemic struck with all its restrictions. Now even though you’ve changed the date three times you now feel you can no longer go. How does that make you feel?
Your living arrangements change. How does that make you feel?
You go to the fridge to eat that last piece of chocolate cake only to find someone has beaten you to it. How does that make you feel?
In all of these scenarios something has changed that you didn’t plan to change. For some people, in some of these instances, they may just shrug their shoulders and only feel slightly inconvenienced, after all it’s no big deal. For others it can completely throw them off track.
Let’s look at these scenarios again.
You’re working from home, maybe you have children who are also off school and you’re trying to help them with all their homework. You scheduled a one hour business meeting over Zoom. You’ve set the children a fun activity they can do without your help with a scrumptious reward if they don’t disturb you during your meeting. And then right at the last minute the person you are scheduled to speak with asked to change the time!!! Now what to do? Do you sweetly say, “Of course, no problem at all”? Knowing full well that your children will create havoc if you try and reschedule their fun activity and goodies. Or do you tell this potential new client that it’s not possible to reschedule knowing that you risk losing the contract. You have a choice.
Your family has been really looking forward to their holiday at Euro Disney since before the pandemic struck. Each time you change the date the family, though they understand the restrictions caused by the pandemic, are still upset and sulky. Though Euro Disney are being fantastic about rescheduling your stay, the booking has run out on your Eurotunnel ticket who won’t let you reschedule. You have already lost the money on this ticket so do you, buy another ticket which you really can’t afford, or do you cancel the holiday altogether? Making sure you promise the family that you will rebook once the pandemic is under control? Either way the family is upset and cross with all parties holding you responsible. You have a choice.
You have extended family living with you long-term and though this has been a slightly rocky road overall you have enjoyed it. And then one day they come to you to say they are moving out with immediate effect. No matter what you say they are not open for conversation even though you believe it’s not in their best interest. So what do you do, keep trying to persuade them to stay until a proper plan can be put into place. Alternatively you just let them go hoping it won’t end in the disaster you think it will end in? Either way you know that you will be made to feel bad and wrong. You have a choice.
Last night after dinner there was one lonely, chocolatey, lush piece of cake left.
You took it to the fridge and hid it behind other foods hoping no one else would notice. At lunchtime the following day, whilst everybody else was occupied, you tiptoed into the kitchen, you quietly opened the fridge door, moved everything that was hiding your secret stash. You were drooling with anticipation of the texture and the taste of that hidden delight… Then, to your horror the space was empty, you searched other shelves, pulling out random foodstuff, bowls, jars, looking for the hidden chocolatey delight. As each second ticked by your heart began to sink. Your mind wrestled with not being able to taste the delights of the rich chocolate and the soft moist sponge. The choice of what to do next, sink to your knees sobbing into your arms at the disappointment. Or storm around the house accusing everybody that they had stolen your hidden delight? You have a choice.
In all these above scenarios we have a choice to make. And it would be easy to say that one choice would be good, and one choice would be bad but is that really the case. What do we mean by choice anyway? Now, making a decision is much easier; you way up the pros and cons. You can even draw a line down the centre of a piece of paper. Put pros on one side and cons on the other and weigh up which one would give you the better result, but a choice is just a choice, not a decision. It’s not a good choice nor a bad choice, it is just a choice. Yet we find it so much harder to make simple choices and usually we end up making a decision. The choice is not dependent on the end result, a choice is just a choice, chocolate, or vanilla, you choose.